Tuesday, 8 January 2013

True Confessions with Michelle Graham

Okay, I'm hijacking most of my blog space this week, but I think I deserve it because guess what?

My first book was released today!!!!!

I'm just a bit excited. Can you tell? Landing the Big Ones is now officially available. Click here to check it out!

So as a treat, I thought I'd share with you a true confession of my own. Kind of a funny one that happened recently.

The other night, after I'd finished on the computer, I crawled into bed and started feeling up my hubby. He enjoyed this and took it as the overture that it was. We kissed, and fondled, and licked, and...well you get the idea. Anyway, before we got to the main event, I was giving him an enthusiastic blow job when a pubic hair found it's way into my mouth and lodged itself near the back of my throat. Normally this would be just a minor irritant, but the thing was too far back for me to retrieve it with my finger without gagging (no I don't deep throat). So I tried a couple of discreet coughs, but the damn thing stayed put. Worse yet, it began triggering my gag reflex all on its own. Feeling it would kill the mood to puke on the bed, I bolted for the bathroom, where I proceeded to vomit. Sexy, right? The worst part was, I could still feel the hair! I think it was psychological though.

When the worst was over, I brushed my teeth and opened the bedroom door to see hubby hanging off the side of the bed, looking underneath.

"The cat's under there."

"Which one?"

"The hateful one. He was hiding in the closet and then he tried to get out, but the door was closed so he ran under here."

We wanted the cat out because the hateful cat has a habit of shitting in places we don't want him to. So I held open the bedroom door, while hubby tried to scare the cat out. No luck. Worse yet, I heard a noise from my daughter's room. I can see her bed from the door to our room and she was shifting around on the bed, looking like she was going to wake up. So I sprinted for my bed and hid under the blankets.

"What are you --"

"Shhh! The girl is waking up!"

So we lay there silently waiting to see if she was going to actually wake up and come into our room, because for some reason, ours is the only bathroom they ever want to use. A few moments had passed and I didn't hear her, so I said, "Okay I don't think she's waking up. Honey? Sweetie? Are you awake?"

And I found hubby had fallen fast asleep.  Sigh...

1 comment:

  1. Hahahaha!!!

    Wiping tears from my face - good luck with your book release, babe!I wish you lots of sales.