Wednesday 31 July 2013

Out of the Mouths of Babes

It's been, like, FOREVER since I did a Really Random Wednesday post, but today, my daughter inspired me!

I just love it when kids are too young to understand that what they say could possibly have an alternate meaning. This morning, my daughter was playing with two of her stuffed animals, Rainbow and Magic.

As you can clearly see, Rainbow & Magic are unicorns. Unicorns have a horn right? Stay with me for a moment.

Her: Rainbow and Magic have a daddy.
Me: Well that's good.
Her: They have a daddy and he's a unicorn, too.
Me: That makes sense, since they're both unicorns.
Her: His name is Horny.

Damn my kids and their tendency to name critters after physical traits! We also have stuffies at our house named Furry, Fuzzy, Whitey, Blackie, Beary, Snakey....You get the idea. But to come up with a name like Horny? Never would have thought of that. Of course it takes a 7 year old.

I couldn't keep from smiling, but thankfully I managed to keep my mouth shut, because I was thinking, "Yes, sweetie, most daddies are horny."

So here are a couple more priceless gems from my kiddos. There have been a lot over the years, but these ones stand out:

  • During my son's Toy Story phase (I'm positive that the writers purposely chose the character names to give parents everywhere a good laugh): Look at that big Woody, Mommy! Mommy, I want to play with my Woody.
  • While walking through the Home Depot: That man has a big piece of wood.
  • While my hubby was noisily nuzzling my neck: Ewww, Daddy's eating Mommy!

Of course what worries me more is when they start to actually realize what they're saying. Then I'll be very afraid!

What about you? Did your kids ever spout a line that had you biting back the laughter? I'd love to hear about them!

Monday 29 July 2013

Release Blitz: Get Laid by Annabeth Leong


Renovators have invaded the home of Jason and Eliza Wu. The two haven’t seen a clean surface in months and, even worse, haven’t had a moment to themselves. With stress in their work lives added to stress at home, the couple desperately needs to have some fun. Jason and Eliza embark on a bold plan to make love and get out of the house—at the same time. Through a series of hot adventures and wild mishaps in the car, at Eliza’s mother’s house, on the top floor of the library and everywhere in between, Jason and Eliza find that not only can they survive renovations, they might even be sorry when they’re over.
A Romantica® contemporary erotic romance from Ellora’s Cave
By scooting the heaviest things out of the way with the side of her thigh, Eliza could open the refrigerator door just enough to slide her arm in and identify a wine cooler by shape. She snaked it out of the refrigerator, but her hand slipped on the sweating glass bottle just before she got it clear. It crashed to the floor and shattered, soaking the lower half of her stockings and the big bags of flour and rice from the pantry with pink, sugary alcohol. Shards of glass surrounded her and Eliza swallowed, thinking of her bare feet.
Her husband responded before she could. “Don’t move,” Jason said. He was barefoot himself, but that didn’t stop him from getting in close enough to sweep her up into his arms. The man might sit behind a desk all day at work, but he put in his time at the gym. His taut muscles flexed around Eliza as he lifted her out of the mess and glass and tucked her against his chest.
Jason carried Eliza to the other side of the room and set her on the table. “Are you all right? Did you cut yourself?” He lifted one sticky, stocking-covered foot in his hand and inspected it for injuries.
“I didn’t get hurt.” Eliza caught his other hand and brought it to her lips. “Thanks, Jason. Really.”
He kissed the side of her face in response, and she wished he’d gone for her mouth instead. She reached to pull him in for a better kiss, but before she could he crossed back to the refrigerator and folded his arms across his chest. Eliza and Jason both sighed.
“I think we’re going to have to throw all this food away because of the glass,” Jason said.
“I’m sorry.” She got off the table and tapped one foot, trying to remember where they’d moved the broom.
“You stay there. I’ll take care of this.”
“If you say so.”
“I do.”
Eliza smiled, a little of the tension easing. “I want to do something really fun at home for our anniversary. It’s five years, and maybe our last chance before we have to grow up for real and behave. We should jump on the beds and have sex on the kitchen table.”
“About that…”
“If you haven’t opened the document I shared with you, then you didn’t see the note I made about the latest delay.”
Eliza’s voice darkened. “What?”
“When they checked out the master bathroom, they found a rotten beam. It needs to be fixed, but Bob said it means the job won’t be done until mid-August.”
“But that’s only two weeks before our anniversary! That’s more than a month behind schedule.”
Jason shrugged. He wrapped his hand in a dishtowel and began throwing items from the pantry into a big black trash bag. “I don’t like it any more than you. They have to finish the job eventually, one way or another.”
“He always finds something else! Did you ask him if he’s sure about the schedule this time?”
Jason stood abruptly and stepped away from the mess in front of the refrigerator. “I don’t want you criticizing me for how I talked to Bob. Why did we think renovations were a good idea?”
“Oh, Jason.” Eliza rushed to his side and tried to put her arms around him, but he shook her off.
Her husband rubbed one hand over his face. “I don’t want us to fight again. I want to have a nice time with you tonight. Do you know why I was upset when you got home? I left the office a little early and I was going to straighten up around here and make you dinner. If we could open the damn refrigerator, you’d see I picked up avocados and a bunch of other stuff you like. I got home and found the kitchen like this, and I knew I couldn’t get it sorted out in time to surprise you.”
Jason grunted and tossed a few more things into the trash bag. Eliza hovered nearby, wishing she could wave their problems away and start the fun they both wanted. She found herself staring at his firm ass, trying to remember the last time she’d really grabbed it. They’d always had a good relationship, a hot relationship. She’d been shocked to see how the stress of renovations had reduced them to sniping at each other.
“I miss you, Jason.”
He stopped moving. “What do you mean?”
“I miss your body. When was the last time we really had some time to ourselves?”
“You mean other than time we spend complaining to each other about the renovations from hell?”
“I love that you were going to make me dinner. Really, I do. It’s just there’s something I might need more than dinner. I think we both need it.”
A slow grin spread over Jason’s face. “I may have had an ulterior motive when I decided to make you dinner.”
“I hope you did.” Eliza reached out to him with one hand. “Can’t we clean it up in the morning? We have to stop letting these renovations ruin our lives.”
Jason took her in his arms before she finished her sentence.

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Annabeth Leong has written erotica of many flavors. She loves shoes, stockings, cooking and excellent bass lines. She always keeps a new e-book loaded on her phone and a paperback stashed in her purse, but her eyes are still bigger than her stomach whenever she visits a bookseller. She blogs at, and tweets @AnnabethLeong . Watch for her next contemporary erotic romance from Ellora's Cave, Design and Scandal.

Sunday 7 July 2013

Sinful Sunday with Erin M. Leaf

Well hello! It's been a long time since I've done a Sinful Sunday Feature, and I'm thrilled to have Erin M. Leaf talking about her newest book, Kaylee's First Crush for your enjoyment!

Have you ever longed for someone completely inappropriate? Ever had a crush on your teacher, your boss, your Dad's best friend? You know it's wrong, but you can't help yourself… He's gorgeous and kind and never makes you feel like an idiot. He has electric blue eyes, or warm chocolate skin, or really silky hair. He's tall and muscular and intelligent. You've found yourself staring at him in class, or when you're in a meeting, or maybe at a party, wondering what he'd look like if he unbuttoned his shirt just a teeny-tiny bit.

You tell yourself that you're being ridiculous. He's too old for you. He's your brother's best friend, the guy who tells you when to jump, the man you KNOW doesn't realize you exist, but you can't help yourself. You want him. You want to mess him up and kiss him until neither of you can breathe. He's the crush you just can't get out of your system.

In my latest novel, the heroine, Kaylee, has a crush like that, and even though she's grown up and moved on, she can't forget the man who made her teen years full of longing: Mr. Hugo Valtree. He was her high school English teacher. Now he's a billionaire and so out of her league she can't even catch her breath when they run into each other at the airport. What does she do? She had no where to go.

Crushes are sexy. They're arousing. They're sinful and delicious and sometimes if you're lucky, you find out that the hopeless crush you've had the hots for longer than you want to admit, well, he's been crushing just as bad over you the entire time.

The last person Kaylee expects to run into when her flight is cancelled is Mr. Hugo Valtree, her favorite high school teacher. It’s been five years since she graduated and she’s never forgotten the sexy man who’d been her first crush. Now she’s all grown up, but he’s still out of her league: he’s inherited his father’s company, making him a billionaire. She’s still shy, still a virgin—what can she possibly have to offer him?
Surprisingly, Hugo offers her something instead, something she desperately needs: a place to stay for the night. It’s storming outside and just her luck, all the hotels in the city are booked. Of course, there’s only one bed in his hotel room…

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Author Details:
Erin M. Leaf is a romance novel devotee, the steamier the better. She also writes erotic romance as Marie E. Blossom.
Twitter: @erinmleaf